Look at him. Please sign this and return to the Fed.…
Dear Fed, Like every other Barnard student, I enjoy nothing more than a good old fashioned complaint about our dining halls: the odd hours, the calorie counts, and our inability to use…
New rumors are beginning to circulate that Columbia’s 20th president, Minouche Shafik, has resigned after a brief appearance at a Halloween party on Carman floor 7. Reports say that Shafik decided to…
It’s Halloween season and campus is as scary as ever. From the devilish decorations in our dining halls to vague attempts by RAs to be “festive,” the spooky feeling is spreading. Yet…
Following a lecture on invasive species in EESC BC1001 (Intro to Environmental Science), a first-year Barnard student challenged herself to #SaveTheTrees and kill as many spotted lanternflies as humanly possible. The bugs…
i don’t have much time so listen quick i wanted to get into a section of UN1400 so bad i was desperate so i hired a hitman to kill all of the…
You’ve heard all the rumors about how freshman orientation friend groups never stay together, but now that NSOP is over and you’ve created lifelong bonds with so many people over 2:00 AM…
DODGE HALL — This morning, President McBain Shafted announced the construction of a second gym for Columbia students to use. “We’re naming it Dodge,” she stated. “Yeah, we already have a gym…
Hi Columbia. It’s me again. I know you’ve heard my very loud and very public pleas over the last three expensive years that I’ve spent at your institution. You might’ve thought I…
A classroom of environmental science and engineering majors was befuddled recently by the strange enthusiasm of Professor Matthew Nguyen as he explained the effects of ocean acidification on the ocean’s role as…
