“Of course, Columbia has an ANTI-HAZING POLICY, so we will be abiding by that rule. OK now that all the narcs are gone, let’s get down to business.”…
6. Peter Rabbit: 0/10 - Minus 9.5 points because he’s voiced by James Corden. Minus another 0.5 points because his movie mocks children with allergies… #CancelPeterRabbit let’s get it trending!!!!…
Even though we’re in the midst of a pandemic, there’s still so much pressure to meet someone you like, build a symbiotic relationship, and produce 100 zygotes by the age of 27.…
Kant: When your girlfriend asks if her voice sounds annoying over Zoom, you do not hesitate to truthfully say “yes, indeed it does.”…
General Soleimani was a martyr and a hero. America only has fictional heros, like Spongebob and Ronald McDonald.…
Hell will now be relocated to an area just west of Heaven, and will still be kinda shitty, but in a trendy way, and with the option for Holy Gentrification by next…
Santa managed to eject before the collision; however, Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer along with his other fellow reindeer were killed. #RIPtheReindeer has been trending on Twitter, while clowns all over the…
The dichotomy of this masterpiece is that it panders to a liberal audience through its name whilst simultaneously subverting the ridiculous standard to which the white male is held in society.…
Craig Reede, the President of WADA, said that, “Russia was afforded every opportunity to pump their cyclists with testosterone and ketamine, but the results have not been satisfactory.”…
“BDS is, like, super cool. My ex-girlfriend from high school is studying Bachelor of Dental Surgery in the UK — she says it’s dope. I miss her.”…
