It seems to (still) be unclear to many that the Federal Reserve, in fact, does not have an undergraduate club at Columbia University. The Columbia Federalist has made a statement on this in the past — please read Editorial: We Are Not the Federal Reserve by Max Monical. Yet, somehow, I, Dani, co-managing editor of the (Columbia) Fed, in my half-pink hair and plaid tube top, was asked if I was a part of the FEDERAL RESERVE when recruiting people for the (Columbia) Fed.
Since Max’s article wasn’t enough, here is some reasons why the (Columbia) Fed is not the (Reserve) Fed:
- We do not work for the government
- Looks can be deceiving. Sure, Columbia’s campus can look like a boring government building in Washington, DC. BUT WE ARE NOT THE FEDERAL RESERVE.
- We don’t know much about money
- We don’t even have a treasurer on e-board! How the fuck could we be a bank?
- We are young and don’t have gray hair and also don’t wear suits
- Self explanatory.
- WE ARE FUNNY
- Imagine the FEDERAL RESERVE photoshopping Deantini and Prezbo on the cover of a newspaper. Imagine the FEDERAL FUCKING RESERVE spelling BOOB out on a lawn with their own bodies. You can’t. Because they aren’t us.