After the annual mass posting of Spotify Wrapped on Instagram stories, some users found that their top genre was a niche by the name of “POV: indie”. These users, who have never…
Hi! It’s your Spotify Wrapped here! I just wanted to let you know that you (yes, you!) have the worst music taste out of pretty much every person who uses this app.…
It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals when it was checked by a violent gust of wind that swept up the streets (for…
Need a spooky Columbia-themed Halloween costume? The Fed has got you covered this year with our top five spookiest costumes for this halloween season at Columbia. Dress up as PrezBo’s ghost! That’ll…
New rumors are beginning to circulate that Columbia’s 20th president, Minouche Shafik, has resigned after a brief appearance at a Halloween party on Carman floor 7. Reports say that Shafik decided to…
Amidst all the ghouls, goblins, ghosts, and platform shoe-d frankensteins, exists your platform Doc Marten wearing girlfriend “Twas the night before Halloweekend, and all through campus, Not a creature was stirring, not…
Come here child, what did you bring me? Oh, some delicious apples, how lovely. You’re so nice to your grandma, sweetheart. I’m so lucky to eat you—I mean have you. What big…
In the same year that the first woman ever served as vice president of the United States, a Columbia sophomore gave the Barbie Movie (Dir. Greta Gerwig, 2023) a 4.5 on his…
As both an English major and an unofficial transfer success story, I find joy in mentoring the youth; and so, I am here to caution certain crowds against joining the Barnard English…
Something feels different on campus. Is it that the bushes around Furnald have finally been trimmed? Is it that all the freshman dorms have AC, despite Columbia saying they didn’t have the…
