Make friends and have sex…
While the exact details are yet to be finalised, it is rumored that the class will be taught by Barack Obama—our famous alum who, as an international from Kenya, quit smoking nearly…
“Screw it, turn it in whenever you want! It’s not like thousands of students are hanging onto your every word or anything,” the email read.…
Earlier today, President Bollinger outlined the university’s fall housing plans. Bollinger wrote, “In an effort to mitigate the on-campus spread of COVID-19, we have created a new housing system.…
We obvs believe all women, except if they accuse one of our bros of sexual assault. That’s just not cool, brah. All our Sigma Apple Pie bros are hot as fuck, they…
Sorority Girl Who “Loves How Her Birthday is Always During Spring Break” Feeling Less Smug Now
by Blake Jones
“It’s kind of, like, my thing, you know, that’s who I am and to have that taken away from me, it’s just, like, dude, that’s really not cool... like, I don’t think…
I am writing as both a personal gentrifier and an institutional one. Like the rest of white America who is just now learning about anti-Black racism, I have been pondering current events…
Although Elon Musk and Grimes’s baby is just days old, X Æ A-12 has become the first robot admitted to the Fu Foundation School of Engineering and Applied Sciences.…
According to the source, Bollinger’s email was translated into Pasho, Zulu, Kinyarwanda, and then finally into English in an attempt to ensure the fewest number of university affiliates understood its content.…
“I hope he’s not like this at school,” confided Weiss’s mother. “He’s always telling us he’s at some club called ‘Ref’, I think. I don’t know, maybe he’s less of a nerd…
