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Breaking News

Breaking News/Opinion/Politics/World

Can the News Slow Down for, Like, Five Minutes

by Fenway Donegan
February 1, 2023February 1, 2023

As a dedicated writer for the Columbia Federalist, I do my best to make sure that my content is on the cutting edge of pop culture. I strive to keep all Fed…

Breaking News/On Campus

New Courses to Be Added for Spring 2023

by Lila Muscosky
November 20, 2022November 20, 2022

Happy registration week and congratulations on not getting into any of your courses! This morning, Columbia announced new classes to be added to the course catalog in an attempt to allow more…

Barnard/Breaking News/On Campus

Beilock Announces Year of Dartmouth

by Maria Cuevas, Lila Muscosky, Olivia Ruble, Matthew Pierson and Martha Wyatt-Luth
September 27, 2022September 27, 2022

Following the success of her inaugural Year of Science, Barnard President Sian Beilock has announced last minute plans to immediately begin the Year of Dartmouth™. Beilock announced the following mandates early Tuesday…

Breaking News/On Campus/Politics

Columbia University Ranks Number 1, According to New Ranking Data Released by Columbia University

by Fenway Donegan
September 12, 2022September 12, 2022

In a shocking email from Columbia University released mere moments ago, new data supplied by Columbia University shows that Columbia University ranks number one across all US News and World Report categories.…

Breaking News/Politics/World

The Royal Line of Succession to the British Throne

by Lauren Unterberger
September 8, 2022September 8, 2022

…

Breaking News/Food and Drink

Koronet Pizza Opts Not to Uncover a Grade After Health Inspection

by Nurasyl Shokeyev
April 11, 2022April 11, 2022

MORNINGSIDE HEIGHTS––After dropping a whopping 58 points on its most recent inspection by the NYC health commissioner, Remy Koronet (the owner of the beloved local pizza joint Koronet Pizza) has decided not…

Breaking News/Featured/Food and Drink/New York City

Mon Dieu! Remy Jobless Following Koronet Shutdown

by Matthew Pierson and Olivia Ruble
April 5, 2022April 5, 2022

As we stood outside the iconic storefront, Street Rat-turned-Chef Remy struggled to hold back tears as NYC Health Department officials plastered their scathing condemnation of the beloved Columbia establishment.…

Breaking News/On Campus

Seeya Terminal 5: Bacchanal Board announces last-minute return to campus

by Wesley Schmidt
April 1, 2022March 31, 2022

On Thursday, March 31, the Bacchanal Board announced that there will be a last-minute change to the event’s location. Though previously scheduled to take place at Terminal 5, a concert venue downtown,…

Breaking News/On Campus

REPORT: Friction in Stacks Caused Butler Fire

by Olivia Ruble
October 20, 2021October 21, 2021

A blushing firefighter who responded to the Butler fire alarm last night has confirmed with Federalist reporters that the incident was the result of some “energetic humping” in Stack Level 5.…

Breaking News/On Campus

Breaking: FEMA Designates McBain “Disaster Area”

by Zoe Davidson
October 11, 2021October 11, 2021

This Sunday, the ​​Federal Emergency Management Agency officially designated McBain a “Disaster Area.” The agency typically reserves such designations for extreme events like wildfires, hurricanes, and nuclear meltdowns, but, according to a…

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