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PrezBo

On Campus/PrezBo/Style

Columbia Dresses as MIT for Halloween in Attempt to Regain Number Two Ranking

by Molly Durawa, Ana Pekec, Aruna Das and Nola Gallo
November 1, 2022November 3, 2022

Morningside Heights residents were surprised to see Columbia’s typically picturesque campus transformed into an MIT-themed dystopia.  The entire university, including the students and buildings, has put on a ‘costume’ modeled after the…

Barnard/On Campus/PrezBo

Columbia Rebrands U.S. News Burn as ‘Reputation Era’

by Dani Winkler
September 25, 2022September 26, 2022

Columbia University has finally responded to its demotion on the U.S. News and World Report college ranking list, decrying the campus-wide scandal as the beginning of the University’s “Reputation Era.” President Lee…

On Campus/PrezBo

A List of Every Cuss We Know to See if The Federalist Will Print It

by Lauren Unterberger, Matilda Darragh-Ford and Mollie Schmidtberger
September 8, 2022September 8, 2022

Ass Asshole Bastard Bitch Bollocks Cock Damn Dick Fuck Hell Shit Wanker Oh shit, they really did it. They really published all those words. This is the First Amendment in action.  Love,…

On Campus/PrezBo

As Grad Student Protests Continue, Prezbo Hosts Dramatic Reading of “If You Give a Mouse a Cookie”

by Safi Rhymenson
November 14, 2021November 14, 2021

When asked for a comment, one grad student in Comparative Literature, who wished to remain anonymous, stated: “I don’t really know. It feels almost a little pointed, like he’s saying that we’re…

PrezBo

“I Have Teeth Too”: Prezbo spotted on the picket line

by Charlotte Hoskins
November 7, 2021November 9, 2021

Union champion?: Graduate student workers were very surprised on Wednesday afternoon when they spotted Prezbo on the picket line. When asked why he was protesting, he replied that he is currently in…

Pop Culture/PrezBo

Prezbo Dresses Up as Ellen for Halloween, No One Can Tell He’s in Costume

by Benjamin Scherzer and Katherine St. George
October 31, 2021November 15, 2021

On Monday, Columbia University President Lee C. Bollinger announced via an email his “dissatisfaction and disappointment” with students’ lack of reaction to his recent display of Halloween spirit. What was thought to…

On Campus/PrezBo/World

Breaking: Prezbo is Trump’s Supreme Court Pick

by Claire Ponnaiya
September 25, 2020September 19, 2021

Although Trump ignored RBG’s dying wish of being replaced after the election, she can rest easy knowing her replacement is not only from the “very disgraceful, liberal institution” where she went to…

On Campus/PrezBo

After Ancestry.com Binge, President Bollinger Comes Out as One-Sixteenth Native American

by Matthew Nola and Nikhil Mehta
April 8, 2019August 17, 2021

In his concluding remarks, Bollinger made a surprising revelation: “I have been notified by my ancestors that all lands previously inhabited by the Lenape people have been granted to me, personally.”…

On Campus/PrezBo

PrezBo Trapped in Giant Soup Dumpling

by Thomas Germain
April 10, 2017November 5, 2021

"We've got to get him out of there."…

On Campus/PrezBo

Bollinger to Manhattanville: “You’re Welcome”

by Erika Sherr
March 21, 2017November 5, 2021

“Those residents will be thanking us once they’ve tasted their first salad from Sweetgreen.”…

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