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Food and Drink

Food and Drink/On Campus

Shrimp Jack and Shrimp Rose Found Dead After Unexpected Storm Takes Out Shrimp Boat Titanic

by Danielle Odigie
April 18, 2022April 18, 2022

NEW YORK, NY— After an unexpected storm on Tuesday, first responders confirmed the death of Shrimp Rose and Shrimp Jack. The pair were attending the Columbia sponsored “Surf and Turf” when inclement…

Breaking News/Food and Drink

Koronet Pizza Opts Not to Uncover a Grade After Health Inspection

by Nurasyl Shokeyev
April 11, 2022April 11, 2022

MORNINGSIDE HEIGHTS––After dropping a whopping 58 points on its most recent inspection by the NYC health commissioner, Remy Koronet (the owner of the beloved local pizza joint Koronet Pizza) has decided not…

Breaking News/Featured/Food and Drink/New York City

Mon Dieu! Remy Jobless Following Koronet Shutdown

by Matthew Pierson and Olivia Ruble
April 5, 2022April 5, 2022

As we stood outside the iconic storefront, Street Rat-turned-Chef Remy struggled to hold back tears as NYC Health Department officials plastered their scathing condemnation of the beloved Columbia establishment.…

Food and Drink

Chef Mike Put My Grandma in His Subs

by Emily Olson and Sophie Simons
April 1, 2022March 31, 2022

It’s always “Chef Mike’s Sub Shop,” “Chef Mike’s Grandma Special,” but they don’t know the truth. He always says he got the recipe from his grandma, but he didn’t say where he…

Food and Drink

“We Just Hate Women,” Barnard Dining Says to Complainers

by Zoe Vogelsang and Gustie Owens
April 1, 2022March 31, 2022

“Whiner, whiner, chicken diner,” Barnard Dining representatives said in response to The Fed’s attempt to get an interview about recent complaints from Barnard students about their dining hall hours, calorie counts, food…

Food and Drink/On Campus

You Go, Girl: I Pick Through Fruit Salad to Channel My Womanly Hunter-Gatherer Instincts

by Olivia Ruble
March 31, 2022March 31, 2022

Is it shameful to prefer pineapple to cantaloupe? I think not. Actually, I find it natural to zero in on the yummiest, juiciest selections for my picking. Every day, I enter John…

Food and Drink/On Campus

Chef Mike Joins Cameo: “I’ll Make You a Sub and Sing Happy Birthday”

by Emma Sullaway
February 28, 2022February 27, 2022

JOHN JAY KITCHEN — With the recent opening of “Chef Mike’s Sub Shop” and popularity of Columbia Dining’s YouTube page, Chef Mike has decided to connect with his fans on Cameo. After…

Food and Drink

Morton Williams Condemned for Public Displays of Nudity

by Emily Olson
December 2, 2021December 12, 2021

In a graphic and obscene display, workers removed the scaffolding on the southwest corner of 115th Street and Broadway, leaving Morton Williams Supermarket, an apartment complex, and Ivy League Stationers indecently exposed.…

Food and Drink/On Campus

CANCELLED: The Problematic History of Serf & Turf

by Amelia Fay
October 20, 2021October 20, 2021

Every year, Columbia students gather on Butler Lawn for a beloved tradition: Surf & Turf. But before you young Columbians fill your plates with those fly-infested mountains of shrimp and beef, you…

Food and Drink/On Campus

Stopping by JJ’s on a Snowy Evening

by Amelia Fay
April 12, 2021May 16, 2021

Whence this takeout is I think I know. To me those doors are now closed though; No one will see me stopping here To watch John Jay pile up with snow. My…

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