An Interview with Marcel Duchamp Right before his death, The Fed had the pleasure of interviewing the avant-garde artist Marcel Duchamp. His work focused on experimental, nonconformist ideas that manifested in all…
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Welcome Freshmen. Welcome to NSOP. Welcome to the most important week of…
One question looms as we enter the 2026-2027 academic year. Are you…
Following over thirty years of service to the Morningside Heights and Columbia…
On the afternoon of February 9, Claire Shipman announced via Instagram Live that the 2026 University Commencement would be moved to “the other side of the fucking moon” citing “cost restrictions” and…
There I was, sitting in the Butler bathrooms. My safe space: a fecal oasis amidst the chaos of Columbia. Within those walls of solitude, one can find a few elusive moments of…
Upon seeing tremendous box office success upon its release this past weekend, the First Lady’s new documentary, “Melania,” has been announced as the 2026 Athena Film Festival opening night screening. “‘Melania’ was…
The Justice Department’s release of three million additional files from the Epstein investigation has sent shockwaves through the Columbia community, with the implication of several prominent professors, trustees, and “Center for Well-Being”…
“It’s just like, holy shit man, I’m tired,” sighed Punxsutawney Phil, leaning against a brick wall outside of the bar while speaking with a Fed reporter last night. Bringing a cigarette to…
This morning, Linus Infection BC ‘26, showed up to their 10:10 AM philosophy class with a single tissue shoved into the side pocket of their bag. Having sniffled a couple of times…
NEW YORK, NY – This morning, The Fed obtained an exclusive report that Columbia senior Hayes Tiu-Reed became the first student on campus to achieve one of their New Year’s Resolutions, with…
NEW YORK – A massive winter storm blanketed the tristate area in eight to twelve inches of fresh snow today, forcing schools and businesses to close. However, for members of the Columbia…
On Sunday, January 25th, faculty, students, and other members of the Columbia community were informed that Jennifer Mnookin, chancellor at a safety school, was selected as the next President of Columbia University.…
Happy Holidays! This is Santa, sending out a mass dispatch to all your little munchkins — naughty and nice — around the globe. We at the North Pole get a lot of…
In a recent announcement this week, the Presidential Search Committee shared that they are still unable to find a single person who actually wants to be University President. “We know this may…
Dear Professor [NAME], I hope this email finds you well. I, unfortunately, am not doing so great, especially after taking your exam today. However, I think I have some pretty good explanations,…
