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by Federalist Staff
September 22, 2026September 22, 2026
Breaking News/Featured

The John Jay Shitter: Fecal Matter as a Kind of Resistance 

An Interview with Marcel Duchamp  Right before his death, The Fed had the pleasure of interviewing the avant-garde artist Marcel Duchamp. His work focused on experimental, nonconformist ideas that manifested in all…

Continue Reading »
Breaking News/Featured

Advice for Single Freshmen During NSOP

by Livy Molko
September 13, 2026September 13, 2026

Welcome Freshmen. Welcome to NSOP. Welcome to the most important week of…

Breaking News/Featured

How to Get Your Partiful Numbers Up

by Eamon Costello
September 1, 2026September 2, 2026

One question looms as we enter the 2026-2027 academic year. Are you…

Graphic by Reza Shayesteh
Fedvestigations/Food and Drink

1020 to Shut Its Doors Permanently 

by Reza Shayesteh and Livy Molko
July 9, 2026July 9, 2026

Following over thirty years of service to the Morningside Heights and Columbia…

On Campus

Columbia Halts Dorm Renovations Over Gentrification Concerns

by Anonymous
November 12, 2015November 13, 2021

Every room will now look out onto a shaft.…

On Campus

Lerner Hall Collapses Under The Weight of Unchecked Mail

by Max Rosenberg
November 11, 2015November 13, 2021

It looks like it's Ferris Booth's day off.…

On Campus

Biomedical Engineering Society Projects “Please Have Sex With Us” Onto Low Library

by Pierre Joseph Gambon
November 10, 2015November 13, 2021

"I've resigned myself to the fact that I'll probably take after my favorite amoeba and just reproduce asexually."…

On Campus

Fucking Savage Runs Wrong Way Around Dodge Tracka

by Andre Adams
November 9, 2015November 13, 2021

The rogue jogger was reportedly later spotted using a cardio machine without having signed up.…

World

International Briefing: First Sheikh Shack To Open In Saudi Arabia

by Anonymous
November 8, 2015November 13, 2021

Because the ingredients will be locally sourced, the food is expected to be a bit oily.…

On Campus

Feditorial: Fraternity Council Should Accept Keystone Pipeline Proposal

by The Feditorial Board
November 7, 2015November 13, 2021

The pipeline would provide cheap fuel for Columbia’s nightlife.…

World

NASA Set To Launch Probe To Search For Life Below 110th St.

by Thomas Germain
November 4, 2015November 13, 2021

NASA has confirmed that there is no intelligent life around Washington Square Park.…

World

Breaking: Bernie Sanders Projected To Win Local School Board Seat

by Max Rosenberg
November 3, 2015November 13, 2021

Despite not being on the ballot, Sanders reportedly received write-in votes from 85% of Whole Foods customers.…

On Campus

News Brief: On Campus, Slippery Slope Arguments Go Downhill Quickly

by Anonymous
October 30, 2015November 13, 2021

Students report often sliding into this logical trap.…

World

Breaking: Abandoning 8-Child Policy, Pope Declares 9-Child Policy

by Anonymous
October 29, 2015November 13, 2021

While China ended its one-child policy today, the Pope showed once again that he's ahead of his time.…

On Campus

Columbia Health Promotes New, Legal Alternatives to Underage Alcohol Consumption

by Seth Farkas
October 27, 2015November 13, 2021

Columbia Health's 5 AM fire alarms are also encouraging student exercise.…

World

Muggings Are The New Normal At Yale

by Ben Greenspan
October 26, 2015November 13, 2021

During midterms, remember that it could be worse.…

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