Though it feels quite chilly, spring sports are officially in full swing at Columbia! At the same time, the University has observed a significant decline in sporting event attendance, despite promoting games…
Like most Columbia students, this winter break, I returned home to the sunny land of Los Angeles and immediately entered a state of academic witness protection. My laptop and I did not…
In the most recent issue of the Sundial, the paper’s editorial staff took the time to reaffirm their journalistic commitment to licking that boot. Editor-in-Chief Trey Donmey published the following statement: “As…
In what many are calling a “huge step forward” for the couple, it was reported last Thursday that, during a particularly intense argument, Columbia junior Ron Stern at last met his girlfriend’s…
Regularly saying he was “at a very Chinese time” in his life, Engel O’Saxson, CC ’28, decided to enroll in Elementary Mandarin. Unfortunately, a familiarity with screenshotted RedNote memes and a love…
Little Johnny, CC ‘29, had only heard the legend of Baroness Nemat Shafik when he was accepted into Columbia. Shafik was just a faded myth, the big bad wolf of generations past.…
MORNINGSIDE HEIGHTS, MANHATTAN — In a triumphant display of engineering ethics, a new poll conducted at SEAS has shown that 0% of students who have interned at defense contractors even considered that…
Columbia’s School of International and Public Affairs has faced backlash for introducing a new seminar titled, “From Nick Cage to Kim Kardashian: Do Californians Deserve Human Rights?” The course description described the…
Captain Bayonne, Columbia’s local bottle-flipping sensation, has recently come into the spotlight for a not-so-flipping awesome reason. Students are used to seeing him perform his special feat on Low Steps in his…
According to sources close to the Office of the President, new University President Jennifer Mnookin reportedly cracked her knuckles, opened up her laptop, and created an email draft with the subject line…
