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Anand Shukla-Parekh

Head Submissions Editor 2026-2027, Trinity Dual BA, GS '27. After learning how to be funny in Ireland (shoutout the Piranha) he moved to NYC to do comedy with the Fed. He will then use his philosophy degree to get a real job at the philosophy factory opening downtown.

Articles/Politics

Mamdani Welcomes Mnookin With Key to the City, Which Unfortunately Fails to Open Columbia Gates

by Anand Shukla-Parekh
October 5, 2026October 5, 2026

At the invitation of Mayor Zohran Mamdani, President Mnookin was welcomed at Gracie Mansion earlier this week in formal recognition of her ascension to the throne of Columbia University.  Dressed in that…

The Core

10 Phrases to Spice Up Your Contributions to LitHum

by Anand Shukla-Parekh and Walter Straughn
October 5, 2026October 5, 2026

So you didn’t do your reading. You told yourself you’d stay up after that 10 PM trip to JJ’s. And when you came back at 1 AM and watched Fruit Love Island…

Articles/On Campus/Opinion

Year In Review: A Ranking of Clery Crime Alerts

by Anand Shukla-Parekh
May 4, 2026May 3, 2026

After 9 months of school, life at Columbia University in the City of New York tends to fall into a predictable rhythm: FacHouse dinners, Butler lock-ins, skipping that one class every Thursday,…

Articles/Music

Bacchanal Moved to Baker Athletics Complex

by Elijah Segal, Inica Kotasthane and Anand Shukla-Parekh
March 31, 2026March 31, 2026

On April 1, Columbia University Ceremonies announced that this year’s Bacchanal, the traditional spring student-led concert, will be held at the Robert K. Kraft Field at Baker Athletics Complex. This announcement follows…

Articles/Breaking News

Columbia’s 50+ New Minors

by Anand Shukla-Parekh, Emily Lepow and Oliver Green
March 23, 2026

This week, Columbia announced via email that they will be introducing 50+ new minors, including but not limited to:…

Articles/Barnard/Breaking News/Politics

BREAKING: Analysis of Barnard Demographics Reveals Troubling Gender Disparity

by Anand Shukla-Parekh
October 27, 2025October 28, 2025

Following an agreement with Daddy Donald to carry out a comprehensive evaluation of their admissions practices, Columbia has finally released the results of their audit. Findings include a 39% international student enrollment…

Articles/On Campus

In Lieu of Opening Campus, Columbia Pledges to Give Halloween Candy to Local Residents

by Anand Shukla-Parekh
October 27, 2025October 20, 2025

With local tensions rising over Columbia’s (possibly illegal) decision to have campus remain closed to residents of Morningside Heights, the administration has proposed a new program aiming to “sweeten” relations with residents.…

Articles/Breaking News/On Campus

“6 – 7”: Alma Mater Seemingly Predicts Columbia’s 2026 US News Ranking Like Some Bizarre Bronze Groundhog

by Anand Shukla-Parekh
September 29, 2025September 27, 2025

With less than 2 weeks until US News releases their list of best colleges for 2026, Columbia students have been spotted compulsively reloading r/ApplyingToCollege and arguing on the phone with relatives about…

Featured

Personal Profile: One Night Stand’s Room Genuinely Only Furnished With One Nightstand

by Anand Shukla-Parekh
September 29, 2025September 24, 2025

It could’ve happened to anyone. I was downtown last Friday night, a little drunk in some godforsaken divebar. He looked cute. Six five, blue-eyed, even told me he worked in finance with…

© 2025 – all rights reserved.

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