At a time of peak winter-weather cuddles, Punxsutawney Phyllis has kicked husband Phil to the couch due to the recent warm, specifically spring, weather. TMZ reports that Phil has been “out of control” this week, and has spent several nights at the Dirty Stump, the local dive bar located in his burrow. Sources inside the bar report he was getting “turnt off that elixir of eternal life” and “stumbling through the rodent tunnels” in a “frankly depressing, not just seasonally” way.
The Hollywood Fix, devoid of Addison Rae content for once, followed Phil home, where they saw him chuck his beer bottle in the gutter, strip down to a wife-beater, and trudge over to the fridge. “Phil, I’d better not smell any more of that goddamn elixir on your buck-toothed breath,” Phyllis shouted from the bedroom. Phil groaned, “I was just working late at the office,” and slumped down on the couch. “You can stay there tonight,” Phyllis said.
With this relationship on the rocks, it appears the couple’s children, Sunny and Shadow, won’t be receiving any more punny-named siblings in the upcoming months.
