Columbia University recently released its plans to invest in infrastructure to support the ever-expanding undergraduate population. Alongside the institution’s funding for these campus improvements, the School of International and Public Affairs has announced its new graduate program in partnership with the United States Department of Defense War.
SIPA will now be offering a master’s degree in “Sir, Yes Sir!” including courses such as “I Spy: The Art of Civilian Surveillance” with adjunct professor Peter Thiel, “Boots, Boots, Boots: A Culinary Guide to Licking Soles” featuring a panel of pardoned January 6th freedom fighters, and “WHAT THE FRACK: Why America Needs to Help the Middle East” sponsored by Exxon. This new program aims to better equip the future leaders who reportedly go here with the necessary skills to combat “lame wokies.” In response to this development, the Trump Administration has announced that Columbia may even receive a Gold Star for being such a good boy.
