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Sydney Kelble

Articles/Health and Fitness/On Campus

Students Horrified after Connecting Clery Crime Alert about Public Masturbation to Uris Pool Closure Announcement

by Sydney Kelble
May 4, 2026May 3, 2026

Earlier this week, a pair of emails sent out to the entirety of the Columbia Student and Faculty body sent shock waves through the community. The first email featured an all too…

Articles/Barnard/Food and Drink

In Wake of Discovered Connection to Epstein, Barnard Announced that the Diana Center will no Longer Serve Cheese Pizza

by Sydney Kelble
May 4, 2026May 3, 2026

In a message sent to the Barnard Community it was announced that the Diana Center would no longer be offering their customizable Cheese Pizzas. In a rare move, Barnard was incredibly candid…

Articles/Arts and Culture/Opinion

Fed Horoscope: Your Predictions for This Month Based on Your SAT Score

by Sydney Kelble
February 13, 2026February 11, 2026

1500–1600 (Top 1–2%): Hey, nerd! Make sure no one ties your shoelaces together.  1400–1490 (Top 3–6%): You will get off of that waitlist. All you have to do is simply run to…

Articles/Breaking News/On Campus

Columbia Mail Informs Students Packages Over 2lbs Will Be Dumped Into the Hudson

by Sydney Kelble
September 29, 2025September 27, 2025

Students are in outrage upon discovering that, after the failure of its email system and subsequent mail backup, Columbia’s Mail Room decided that any package weighing over 2lbs will be redirected straight…

© 2025 – all rights reserved.

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