Editorial: We Are Not the Federal Reserve

It’s not often that Fed needs to come out with an entirely serious piece, but you all have pushed us to our limit. Please, for the love of Jesus, we are not the Federal Reserve. If you are angry about interest rates, DON’T WRITE TO US. If you think Jerome Powell should be doing something else, please note that HE DOES NOT WORK HERE. 

We are the pseudo-funny, anti-establishment, cool club on campus. We are NOT the incredibly important, innovative, and politically-independent institution which controls interest rates through money supply.

We don’t want your vital complaints to go to waste; your strongly-worded emails will undoubtedly be read by Jerome Powell himself if you just send them to the right place! We’re sure he will listen to your very informed, well-thought-out opinions about gas prices and act on them immediately.