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MTA Blindsided by Totally Unexpected Tropical Storm Third Week in a Row

Following an onslaught of extreme weather, government officials are utterly shocked by New York’s poor infrastructure after being continuously reminded of New York’s poor infrastructure. 

“I mean, how were we supposed to know Hurricane Ida would flood the subways?” exclaimed Transportation Commissioner Harold Gutman, a week after the subways were flooded by Hurricane Henri. 

NYC is no stranger to subway renovations, though. Following Hurricane Sandy in 2012, much needed improvements were implemented such as digital advertisements, less inaccurate clocks, and other features integral to preventing floods. While these additions may not have been enough, Mayor Bill de Blasio claims there are big changes to come: “One word: Gondolas. Who needs the 1 train when you can be rowed down Broadway by a handsome Italian man?”