Above them all, the turkey levitated and settled itself into my outstretched arms. It was heavy and wet, but something about it just felt… right.…
"As you know, I am the Vice President of Public Safety at Columbia. Unfortunately, my job has been incredibly boring these past few months. Everyone stuck at home means no crimes, and…
“Big city politicians may look down on a small town mayor, but every time I sneak into one of my resident’s kitchens in the middle of the night to grab a few…
As you can surmise, our conversation today did not fit my stringent requirements. Therefore, I’ll be sending you an invoice over Venmo for taking up my time. The caption will read: “The…
At first we thought our challenges wouldn’t be insurmountable. We thought that with discipline, resolve, and a heavy dose of hard work, Spec would persevere. But then came the op-eds.…
The news has been met with excitement from Columbia students, especially given that Beto acts as one of few pieces of living evidence that the Columbia Men’s Rowing Team can, in fact,…
“Because I have integrity, because I have principles, I won’t be selling out anytime soon,” said a triumphant Emerson. “I’ll be out there in the trenches, living in a dumpy apartment in…
“Three weeks went by, and not a word from anyone. Just yesterday I received an email from President Bollinger telling me to ‘keep up the great work!’”, said Columbia Housing Executive Director…
"You have the audacity to pull out your 10 page long CC paper and staple it as if you explicitly mean to torture me."…
You wear Goodwill; I wear Canada Goose. …
