Tags: #enemiestolovers #feddial #tsundere!sundial #delinquent!fed #columbiauniversity #universityau #tsundere #baka #fakenews #mamdani
“Another stupid day at this stupid school,” The Columbia Sundial grumbled.
It was an early, snowy Monday at Columbia University. As Sundial trudged through College Walk, a few students glared at them. Maybe it was because Sundial only showered thrice a week — and therefore had a potent musk — or maybe it was because of their controversial opinions. Sundial smirked and pointed their nose up at the haters.
Sundial loved to enroll in seminars, just so they could voice their controversial opinions that nobody wanted to hear. They loved the glares they got from their peers as they incited debates that they had no valid argument for. Deep down, however, Sundial knew that they only enrolled in seminars because their father, The Free Press, never gave them any attention as a child.
Unfortunately for Sundial, they had to take an introductory Anthropology lecture with Professor Mahmood Mamdani to complete their Core requirements. It made Sundial’s blood boil, considering that the professor was the father of NYC’s new Democratic Socialist mayor.
Sundial glanced at the date on the chalkboard: February 13, 2026. Valentine’s Day was coming soon, and Sundial was planning to spend that day moping in their dorm like a chud.
“Still getting those anonymous letters on your dorm door?,” the Columbia Political Review smirked, blocking Sundial from climbing up the stairs to their usual seat.
Sundial’s face flushed. “K-kyaaaaa! How do you know about that?!”
“Hey, don’t shoot the messenger,” the Columbia Political Review raised their hands in surrender, “everyone’s wondering who actually wants to write to you.”
The Columbia Federalist, Columbia’s number one delinquent and playpaper, strolled in. They were notorious for their summer situationship with the Columbia Daily Spectator, but during the first week of classes, they met Spec at Amity Hall to publicly announce that they were no longer a thing.
“Still teasin’ the Sundial, Columbia Political Review?” The Fed leaned an arm on the other publication, “That was so last semester. You already know how they feel about anonymous notes. Besides, Sundial’s not even relevant anymore.”
“O-oh yeah?” Sundial’s face turned red, “Who even knows who you are, Federalist?”
“Practically the whole school,” The Fed replied coolly. “But you keep bringing me up in your discussions… are you tryin’ to get my attention, Sundial?”
A few students chuckled.
“H-hmph! Baka!” Sundial turned their head and crossed their arms, “It’s n-not like I like you or anything!”
Professor Mamdani entered the lecture hall, and everyone took their seats. The Fed sat down, but not before turning to Sundial.
“Might wanna look under your seat.”
Sundial reached under the chair and pulled out a heart-shaped sticky note that read:
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Meet me at Dodge tonight
To see who’s your boo
Xoxo,
Your secret admirer
Sundial puffed up their cheeks angrily, crumpling up the anonymous note. But curiosity got the best of them. A pink flush tinted their cheeks. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to find out who their first (and only) admirer was…
