Can’t bear the lunchtime chaos? Skip the line and buy a table instead!
Inspired by the hottest NYC clubs, Ferris now offers advance table reservations for you and up to five of your closest acquaintances (or most tolerable classmates).
Your package includes:
- Personalized table service (from someone who definitely loves their job).
- Elegant plastic seating.
- A mandatory 25% gratuity—because you can’t put a price on class, but we did.
All this for just 150 Flex Dollars per person— food and drink not included.
Feast on gargantuan turkey legs, impossibly dense chocolate cake, and scrambled eggs with that Ferris-style signature hint of rubber.
Student testimonials:
“The table service really elevates the experience of waiting forty minutes for beige pasta.”
“Finally, a place where I can experience both class stratification and indigestion.” “The Ferris VIP section is the closest I’ve felt to God—mostly because it’s on the second floor.”
Book your magical experience now at:
ferris.table\booknow-wewanturmoney\🤑.cudining.edu
Sponsored by Coca-Cola Freestyle™, Paul’s Baby Grand, and The Columbia Investment Management Company—because your tuition dollars weren’t quite enough.
