A study conducted by Columbia’s Economics department found that few students wear assless chaps to class, despite their comfort, style, and inexpensive price. The authors, who hoped to better understand sartorial trends in NYC, confessed they found their results “somewhat surprising.”
“We hypothesize that assless chaps have fallen out of favor because they are too warm for daily wear in summer and spring, but not protective enough against chilly fall and winter weather. Our findings reveal that students are instead turning to ass-full chaps.”
Their study did uncover that, in general, the student body embraces slutty outfits no matter the season. And, during Halloween and Bacchanal, students report wearing assless chaps with relative frequency. Another team of researchers who reviewed these findings contends that more investigation is required to explain Columbia classes’ assless chapslessness.
