Barnard Students Left in Waiting Room of Zoom Rager

Artwork by Isabel Stern

It was already a strange start to the year. There was no walking through Butler before knowing it would become your central crying location, no texting your friends about how much you love the 1 train after riding it to 110th for Panda Express, and (for many) there were no Carman parties.

Thus, when a group of freshmen organized a Zoom party, students were optimistic there would still be some semblance of the Barnumbia spirit in the midst of a global pandemic. 

But, as Barnard students logged on to Zoom, they received a message notifying them to stay in the waiting room. They assumed it was standard procedure and everyone would be admitted. Little did they know they would be stuck waiting for hours while countless CC/SEAS students were let into the Zoom call.

A first-year CC student, who has opted to remain anonymous, has denied any wrongdoing. He claimed to Federalist reporters that “[he] was just trying to make things as close to real life at Columbia,” one in which Barnard students need sign-ins to parties. “We need rules. Why go to this university if I can’t bask in my Ivy League superiority somehow? I mean, Barnard students are already infiltrating our classes!”

Sources claim he put these measures in place because he was salty after his team was crushed by Barnard students in a Columbia trivia-themed Kahoot. Others claim it was a group action implemented by CC students who were horrified after learning the fates of club applications they were working on since junior high were in the hands of Barnard students in club leadership.