Tensions froze in a standoff on Sunday between campus security and snowmen on the South Fields in front of Butler Library. Around 1:00 PM Sunday, campus security was notified of 6 to 7 “suspicious figures” standing menacingly on the South Fields. When campus security arrived at the scene, they began questioning the suspects behind the fence, asking them to show their student IDs. The snowmen seemed to be engaged in a silent protest, refusing to respond to the security personnel.
A sharp breeze blew one of the suspect’s carrot noses onto the ground. Campus security then yelled, “Freeze!” fearing the nose was a secret protest banner about to be unveiled; the suspects complied immediately. A small crowd began to form among students who were too committed to their studies to take the snow day. Security received a chilly reception from the student crowd, who were confused about which side to take in the altercation. Half the crowd began to chant, “ICE OUT!” assuming the composition of the snowmen meant DHS employed them. The other half of the crowd began complaining that campus security was “harassing a minority group”.
After checking their scarves, mittens, and tophats, in a blatant strip search, campus security confirmed that none of the snowmen had a CU ID or a guest pass. The snowpeople, one Barnard student corrected the crowd (and this reporter) to avoid assuming their gender, were escorted off campus. In one of the more horrific scenes, security took off heads, torsos, and legs, and began rolling them to the 116th Street exit. Investigations are underway to determine whether students allowed the intruders onto campus or whether additional security is needed to maintain the frigid rules governing campus entry.
