In a less-than-ideal start to Parents’ Weekend, this Friday morning, campus’ Broadway gates endured a vicious mob of furious parents from all across the world. Enraged shouting in Cantonese, Mandarin, Russian, Hindi, and even British arose as parent after parent was denied access to campus by our diligent Public Safety officers. Outraged parents, exhausted from their long travels, railed against everyone from the University’s president to the country’s. But the culprit for this treatment, it turned out, was neither president, nor a glitch or even a public safety officer, but rather the parents’ children themselves, who had failed to complete their parents’ campus access passes.
“Oh no,” one student complained. “I couldn’t wait for my parents to come and judge my friends, criticize my dorm, and ask me uncomfortable questions—and now they can’t even get on campus!” Other students voiced similar distress. “I’m so dumb, I can’t believe I forgot their passes,” another student said. “My parents would be so pissed if they could reach me—but luckily now I can just keep ignoring their texts.” Public safety offered repeatedly to allow parents in as soon as their children filled out the paperwork, but the difficulties continued.
Luckily, students were more than willing to leave campus to visit their parents. Once non-John Jay dinners were on the table, students flocked out from campus. “I just love my parents,” one student said while carrying several large boxes of leftovers. “They’ve travelled 12 hours, I guess they deserve the right to buy me a dinner.”
