The Most Impressive Thing About Me: I Found a Summer Sublet

I’m not usually one to brag but honestly, this accomplishment was too big to not announce: last week, I officially found a sublet in New York City for the summer! I know what you’re thinking: “That’s impossible. There’s literally not a spare bed left in this godforsaken city from the months of May through August.” And you’d be right. Cause I got the last sublet. Yes, you may all clap for me now.

How, you ask? I scoured Facebook groups, begged my parents to call distant relatives, and even texted my freshman year FroSci discussion section group chat. That one was tough because the last message in there was this kid David asking for notes since he was super sick and missed class and no one replied to him. Hope David is having a better junior year…

Eventually, a friend of a friend told me that her aunt wouldn’t be using her walk-in closet in Bay Ridge over the summer and that it was mine if I could cough up $1,500 a month and supply my own mattress. I immediately told Rebecca to tell Emily to tell her aunt I wanted it, and then Venmoed Emily’s aunt my life savings without confirming the last four digits of her phone number because that would have taken too long. Thank god I acted quickly because apparently five kids from Columbia, three kids from NYU, two kids from Pace, and every kid with an IB internship at every northeast liberal arts school were also interested in the spot.

So, come visit me this summer! Just a heads up that you’ll have to sleep on the shelf where Emily’s aunt usually keeps her hat collection.