BROADWAY – Mike Pence’s recent foray into the theatre community left thousands of Americans in an outrage, promising to boycott the show they once held so dear to their hearts. Although Hamilton tickets are still sold out until 2037, local contrarian Brian James is glad to have a reason to voice his dislike of the popular musical. Often referred to as a cultural phenomenon, James thinks that it’s honestly just overrated.
“I mean, I’ve never actually seen it, but the way people go on and on about it, you’d think it was the second coming of Christ or some shit,” he said. “One word against Hamilton, and suddenly you’re seen as ‘uncultured swine’ and a ‘loser.’ I’m tired of being ostracized for my views.”
As the anti-Hamilton sentiment is being normalized, James vows to stand in solidarity with all those who feel personally victimized by Pence’s offensive decision to go see the cultural phenomenon. While James couldn’t give two shits about Mike Pence, any reason to proclaim “fuck Hamilton” is good enough for him.