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Move Over Friendsgiving, There’s A New Sheriff in Town: EnemiesGiving

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It’s a recent phenomenon, Friendsgiving. Much like the famed and corporatized “Galentine’s Day,” Friendsgiving has become another holiday about celebrating your found family: getting together with your closest pals, cooking a hearty meal, drinking some mulled wine, and coming away filled with a fondness of the season and deep appreciation for your loved ones. But we at the Fed know what the true Thanksgiving is about: barely tolerating your uncle’s political takes and gnawing on under-seasoned turkey in your best autumnal-toned outfit. This is why this year, I’m ditching Friendsgiving to host something new: Enemiesgiving. 

Come one, come all to my tiny New York City apartment, where I will be serving bowls of cereal, microwave popcorn, and Trader Joe’s vegetarian chili served directly from the can (still cold). Currently, the guest list includes that frat guy from LitHum, the girl who claimed that she had booked the same study room as me (even though I definitely had the reservation to prove it), the aforementioned-mentioned politically-abrasive uncle, and of course, my entire UW section. In the spirit of the holiday, I’ve even prepared a few conversation topics to foster deep conversation and further human connection. So far, I’ve come up with questions like: What’s your opinion on the death penalty? Is veganism the only moral human diet? What do you think about corruption in the Supreme Court? Does God exist? and of course: Where were you on January 6th? If you would like to attend, please RSVP as soon as possible so I can “prepare” the appropriate amount of chili. I’d love for you to join!