Welcome to my cool boy-girl Hanukkah party! It’s me, you probably remember me from my sick Torah portion at my bar mitzvah two years ago. Anyway, I’m a man now and I’m the coolest kid in high school. Me and some jokers from Mrs. Klonkel’s homeroom were gonna play some dreidel in the basement, you wanna join? Basically, it’s spin the bottle but it’s a dreidel and if u get gimmel u gotta gimme a kissy and if it’s shin you gotta share a kissy with me, and if it’s hey you gotta heyyyyyyy gimme a kissy and if it’s nun nothing happens (gotta stay true to the rules and traditions of my people, ya dig?) oh wait you gotta head out? Very early? That’s chill, we got enough party to last the rest of the party aha. No, sure, yeah I’ll see you lakte! Like later-oh you left. Happy Hanukkah.