Report: Nerd Studying for Finals


BUTLER–Minutes ago, news broke that Steve Hershel, CC ‘22, is studying for his finals like a total nerd.

Despite the fact that his finals aren’t even tomorrow, Hershel was reportedly seen in Butler 301 flipping through his Organic Chemistry textbook trying to review alongside his study guide. He was also spotted with a few of his Lit Hum books in his backpack, a clear indication he is planning to study those too, like a massive dork.

Said his roommate Carl Lee, SEAS ‘22, “I didn’t know the guy I’ve been living with for the past several months was such a try-hard. I mean, I’m in SEAS and even I know he’s being totally extra. I guess that’s just the toll stress culture takes on some people.”

Hershel was not available for an interview, responding only with “These problem sets aren’t gonna study themselves.” God, what a dweeb.