Launching… RoommateMatch

Now available… find the Frank to your Charlie, the Spongebob to your Gary, the Bert to your Ernie… Using our top secret algorithms, we will match you to some ideal roommate candidates based on your year, school, sleep preferences, tiktok preferences, tolerance for pubes, etc.

Either take RoommateMatch below on a Desktop, or take the Mobile version here.

Launch mobile version

The Housing Report

Featured

Sexiled in the City

“I mean, I’m very socially progressive and pro-sex and everything,” Carrie’s roommate Charlotte explains, “but come on, I need to get into my room sometimes to change my shirt or take my gummy vitamins.

Report: Yep, That’s a Cockroach

“Fuck, there’s probably more.”

Codependent Roommates Announce Tentative Steps Towards Independence

“The two girls, who refer to themselves collectively as ‘704,’ their room number, have begun the semester with conflicting class schedules.”

Roommates With Same Schedule Left With No Choice But To Jerk Each Other Off

“We looked into each other’s eyes, and then we both knew, just like that. It felt so natural. It was a really special moment.”

Op-Ed: I Believe People Are Naturally Good, Except My Roommate, Sean

“Society makes people bad, but more like, cheat-on-your-spouse bad – not Sean-level bad.”

Freshman Frantically Hides Illicit Items in Preparation for Parents’ Visit

He even made his roommate take down the Budweiser posters, but that was for aesthetic reasons.